


Oneshots inspired by posts from IncorrectTWICEQuotes

by irdohr



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, IncorrectTwiceQuotes, Prompt Fic, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2018-04-21
Packaged: 2018-12-09 11:06:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 3,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11667870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/irdohr/pseuds/irdohr
Summary: Collection of oneshots inspired by posts from IncorrectTWICEQuotes. Links to the relevant post will be in the notes of the chapter. This story will be labelled as complete, but I may add new oneshots from time to time.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/162970703098/every-time-i-meet-a-new-person-i-figure-out-how

_**Tzuyu:** Every time I meet a new person I figure out how I’m going to fight them_

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Whenever it’s a nice day many people can be seen in the park, laughing, playing or just resting, they all enjoy themselves. On this particular day, if you look closely, you can see Tzuyu and Chaeyoung sharing an ice cream.

While Chaeyoung is savouring in finally getting to spend some time alone with Tzuyu, she notices that Tzuyu is remarkably quiet. She turns to look at Tzuyu and sees that Tzuyu has her thinking face on.

“What are you thinking about?” Chaeyoung asked.

“The ice cream man was about 80 kilograms and around 6 foot. A straight head to head match would be hard, especially while he’s in his van. I could buy an ice cream from him and when he passes it to me, I could grab hold of his wrist and slam his head on the counter. While he’s dazed, I pull him out of the van through the window and slam him on the ground. From there I can kick him while he’s down and when he starts to recover, I can take one of the metal chairs and hit him with it.”

“I think the chairs were bolted down.” Chaeyoung said, trying to get her head around her companion’s... odd... thoughts.

“In that case,” started Tzuyu, “I’d have to make sure to smack him into the table. Maybe blind him with the ice cream, but that would be such a waste. Oh well.” Tzuyu takes a lick of the ice cream.

“Why?...” asked Chaeyoung dumbfoundedly.

“Hmm. Oh, I didn’t like the way he was looking at you.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/163185971160/snickers-commercial-youre-not-you-when-youre

_** Snickers Commercial: **  You're not you when you're hungry. _

_  
** Momo, always hungry: **  [Staring off into the distance] ...Who am I?_

_ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ _

Many people like to make jokes that Momo has two modes, eat and dance. If she’s not doing one then she’s doing the other. Momo just loves to dance, she’s never been the best at expressing herself with her words, but with her dance she can tell an opera. A side effect of that is that she always needs to eat, can’t dance without energy after all.

When Mina arrives home, Momo usually has dinner ready for the two of them, but tonight was different. There was no music, no enticing smells and barely a sound. Mina thought that maybe she and Momo were supposed to go to a restaurant and she forgot. Just then, someone sniffed. It was not a happy sniff, or a sniff of someone enjoying a meal but rather the sniff you get from trying not to cry.

Mina followed the sound and found Momo lying on the sofa with bloodshot eyes.

“Oh honey,” started Mina, “what happened?”

“Mina,” replied Momo, “who am I?”

“Who are you?” asked a confused Mina. “You’re Hirai Momo, the woman I love.”

“But,” Momo sniffed, “there was an advert on TV saying that ‘you’re not you when your hungry’. I’m always hungry, so who am I?”

“It doesn’t matter whether or not you’re hungry, you will still be the woman I love.”

“Really?” said Momo disbelievingly, “I’ve always been hungry, for as long as I can remember. What if I’m just a shadow and I’m stopping the real me from coming out? What if one day, I’m not hungry, the real me comes out and you decide she’s someone you can’t love?” Before Momo could say any more, Mina silenced her with a kiss.

“I’ve seen you at your best and I’ve seen at your worst Hirai Momo, and I still love you. You can’t get rid of me that easy. Who was it that calmed me down every time I got stage fright? Hirai Momo. Who was it that restored my belief in myself when I though ONCE hated me? Who got through to me when no-one else could? Hirai Momo. Who stays by my bedside if I’m sick and nurses me? Hirai Momo. Who’s the woman I proposed to, and want to spend the rest of my life with?”

“Hirai Momo” Momo quietly muttered.

“And who’s Hirai Momo?”

“Me” whispered Momo.

“Who’s Hirai Momo?”

“Me” said Momo shakily.

“Who’s Hirai Momo?” 

“Me” Momo said with a smile.

“Who’s Hirai Momo?”

“Me” Momo said confidently and stood up. 

Momo hugged Mina, tucking her head into Mina’s shoulder and making noises that Mina interpreted as ‘thank you’.

“Feel better?” asked Mina. Momo nodded. “Now how about we go out for dinner tonight? There’s that new restaurant we keep talking about going to.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/163803589046/sana-hey-babe-dahyun-ya-babe-sana-i-love-you

_** Sana: **  Hey babe _

_   
** Dahyun: **  Ya babe? _

_   
** Sana: **  I love you babe _

_   
** Dahyun: **  Oh my god babe, I love you too babe _

_   
** Tzuyu: **  Hey guys, could you shut the fuck up please _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Sorry” mumbled Sana and Dahyun.

“I’m sorry,” sighed Tzuyu. “I’m sorry. It’s just....ARGH!” screamed Tzuyu as she dropped onto the sofa. Sana and Dahyun share a glance before they join her on the sofa, sitting either side of her. 

“You know she still loves you right?” said Dahyun as Sana gently rubbed Tzuyu’s back.

“But not the way that I love her. She only thinks of me as a friend, not as a romantic partner, if that.” Tzuyu hid her face with her hands, trying to not cry. “I shouldn’t have said anything. Before I was such an idiot, we were happy. We spent almost everyday together, and if we didn’t see each other, we at least spoke on the phone, but now...”, Tzuyu remarked, close to tears, “but now...I haven’t heard or seen her in over a month. I don’t want to push her away more than I already have but if she cared then wouldn’t she have least called once to say hello?” Her will crumbled as the Tzuyu finally let herself feel, and started sobbing. 

Dahyun held Tzuyu, tucking Tzuyu’s head into the crook of her neck and letting her cry. Sana hugged the both of them simply repeating “We’re here for you.” 

None of the three noticed, but there was someone else there that night. She was just about to enter when Tzuyu screamed but she stopped. Listening to Tzuyu’s lament, she left, thinking that maybe she doesn’t deserve to call this place home.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/164141456005/dahyun-you-snooze-you-loose-dahyun-downs-ten

_** Dahyun:  ** You snooze you loose! _

__

_** Dahyun:  ** [Downs ten bottles of five hour energy]_ 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Okay,” sighed Nayeon breathlessly as she flopped onto the sofa, “Dahyun is not allowed to have energy drinks anymore.” Nayeon sat there trying to catch her breath, struggling to stay awake.

“What happened to you?” asked Jeongyeon. “You sound like a premium rate phone number.”

“Ha, ha. That was so funny I nearly forgot to laugh.” deadpanned Nayeon. “Seriously though, no energy drinks for Dahyun.”

“Why?”

“Last night, Dahyun had some work she had to finish but she was almost falling asleep as she did it, so I gave her some coffee. It worked a little too well. She got all her work finished, but it left her kind of hyper and running around everywhere. When I suggested that she take a rest, she decided to down ten bottles of ‘5 hour energy’ drinks. She cleaned the entire dorm, hand-washed and dried everyone’s clothes, organised everyone’s wardrobe using a different system each time, hell she even repainted her room.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad,” said Jeongyeon.

“I was running after her all night trying to curb her more dangerous activities and keep her in the dorm. I was not gonna let do anything with the knives, I definitely didn’t trust her with the iron and don’t get me started on how many times she tried to take apart the TV.” Nayeon rubbed her face. “She only crashed and fell asleep a half hour ago. Now if you excuse me.” Nayeon collapsed onto Jeongyeon and started snoring.

“Umm, Nayeon? Nayeon?” said Jeongyeon as she lightly shook Nayeon’s shoulder trying to wake her up. It didn’t work so Jeongyeon decided to have a little nap herself. Not even an earthquake would wake up Nayeon when she’s this tired.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/158771391803/mina-getting-ready-to-cut-her-birthday

_ {Mina getting ready to cut her birthday cake} _

_   
** Jeongyeon: **  If you let the knife touch the bottom while you're cutting it you have to kiss the closet person _

_   
** Mina: **  Is that so? _

_   
** Mina: **  [Clearing her throat] Hey Momo can you just come over here and stand right next to me for a second. _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeongyeon glanced at her watch. “How long has it been since they’ve come up for air?” she asked.

“Going on five minutes now I’d say.” answered Chaeyoung. Out of the corner of her eye, Chaeyoung noticed some of the other members passing money around. Turning to them she asked, “What’s with all the cash?”

“We had a bet on when Mina and Momo would finally get together,” answered Nayeon, “and we agreed that this counts.” 

“So who won?”

“Jihyo and Tzuyu bet that it would be on Mina’s birthday, but Jihyo gets the larger portion of the pot ‘cause she also bet that Mina would be the one to kiss Momo. I’m not worried though, I can still get my money back. Not all of the bets are over.”

“There’s more bets?”

“Sana has that they’ll sleep together by Momo’s birthday, Dahyun has them saying ‘I love you’ by Christmas, I’ve given them a month before they fail at hiding their relationship from ONCE, Tzuyu has their first major argument being due to jealousy and Jihyo has them married within 3 years.

“...”

“Also, me and Jihyo have that’ll be another 10 minutes before they remember we’re here, and Sana thinks it’ll be a half hour.”

Chaeyoung turns her head to Mina and Momo who show no signs of stopping. “Put me down for 15 minutes.”

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/165428207136/when-twice-are-in-new-york-sana-sees-a-girl

_ {When Twice are in New York} _

_  
** Sana: **  [Sees a girl] Oooh she's cute, I'm gonna go and flirt with her _

_  
** Jeongyeon: **  Sana you can't speak English _

_  
** Sana: **  English isn't a barrier when you're as cute as me _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Go ahead”, laughed Jeongyeon, “I’ll be waiting at that café when you strike out.” Sana had a small pout before fluffing her hair and walking over to the girl. Jeongyeon sat down in the outdoor dining area of a café and watched. 

As Sana walked, she put a little bit of sway into her hips. Not so much as to be obvious, but enough that anyone looking at her would find their eyes drawn down to her, in Jeongyeon’s opinion (though she’d deny it if you ever asked her), perfectly proportioned posterior. With just a cursory glance, Jeongyeon could see several people having trouble keeping their eyes away from Sana, including the target. Some of them on dates if the glasses of water thrown in their faces was any indication. 

As Sana got close to her target, Jeongyeon watched as Sana ‘fell’ onto the girl. Jeongyeon knew that despite her clumsy persona, Sana never lost balance. If she fell over, it’s because she planned it. Sana made sure to fall in such a way that the girl would have to touch her ‘assets’ to catch her. A very light touch on the arm and Sana’s hot breaths on the girl’s neck got her hot under the collar. 

The girl helped Sana stand up, and then Sana pulled out the final blow. A shy smile while she pushed some hair back behind her ear. The blush on the girl’s face proved it. She fell. Hook, line and sinker. 

Jeongyeon knew from experience that Sana would have her fun and then be back a half hour later. Jeongyeon waved over a waiter.

“Could I please get a small coffee and the house special?” If she has to wait around, may as well try some local cuisine.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/166350107220/i-was-not-consumed-by-the-gay-agenda-i-am-the-gay

_** Sana: ** I was not consumed by the gay agenda, I am the gay agenda _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The bag covering Jihyo’s head is pulled off without warning. She’s momentarily blinded as her eyes try to adjust to the sudden light. All she can tell for the moment is that wherever she is, it’s very bright. When she tries to lift her hands to rub her eyes, she can’t move them. They’re tied to a chair, she’s tied to a chair. She wonders where she is, and why.

“Finally awake are you?” A voice came from somewhere behind her. It was female voice. There was something familiar about it, but Jihyo just couldn’t place it. “Aww, does the illustrious leader not recognise me?” the voice called out mockingly. There was definitely something familiar about that voice, it’s on the tip of Jihyo’s tongue. “Penny in the air...” Wait, it couldn’t be. It just couldn’t be...

“Sana?”

“And the penny drops.” Sana strolls in front of Jihyo as her vision clears. “I feel like I should be insulted. We’ve known each other how long, and it took you ages to recognise me.”

“Wha...why?”

“I brought you here to make you an offer.”

“An offer?” Jihyo interrupted Sana before she could speak further. “Why? What offer?” Sana grabbed the back of Jihyo’s hair and pulled, forcing Jihyo to look upwards towards her.

“Uh, uh, uh. I don’t like it when people interrupt me.” Sana said as she brought her face closer to Jihyo’s. “You’re lucky you’re cute.” Sana let go of Jihyo’s hair and stood in front of her. 

“I know what JYP taught you, I know why you’re scared for the girls and why you try to stop the sapphic behaviour. I can’t blame you, you were taught to fear homosexuality, to fear the backlash and public outcry.” Sana gently strokes Jihyo cheek with the back of her fingers. “You don’t have to be scared anymore. You don’t have to deny yourself, to pretend to be someone you aren’t. I can show you things that only a woman can show you, I can make you feel better than any man could make you feel, I can prove that you’re loved in the way that you deserve.” 

“Sana! Please stop,” tears are streaming down Jihyo’s face, “You don’t know what you’re saying. You’re just confused. Let me go and we can leave. I’ll get you the help you need and we’ll never mention this again. No-one has to know.”

“I won’t deny who I am Jihyo.”

“This isn’t you. You’ve just been fooled by the pretty colours.”

“You think I was tricked into this? That the ‘gay agenda’ brainwashed me? Ha, ha ha, you silly girl. I was not taken in by the gay agenda, I AM the gay agenda.”

“What? I don’t...I don’t understand.”

“I am the leader of the gays. It is duty to ensure the safety and wellbeing of my people, to help them accept themselves and be the people they were meant to be.” As Sana got close to Jihyo again, Jihyo could see that Sana was close to tears. “I can help you Jihyo. I know what you keep hidden.” Sana placed her hand over Jihyo’ heart. “I see your love for all your girls, for all of us. You’re scared people won’t accept you, that if you accept it, people will find out and we’ll get hurt.”

Jihyo shook her head furiously, trying in vain to stop the tears.

“Please join me. You are not alone. We can protect the girls together.” Sana lay her forehead on Jihyo’s, “Please, Jihyo. I love you.” Sana gave Jihyo the lightest of kisses upon her lips. Silence. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/166976065496/dahyun-when-no-one-was-looking-momo-took-forty

_** Dahyun: **  When no-one was looking, Momo took forty cakes. She took 40 cakes. That’s as many as four tens. And that’s terrible. _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Mama always told me ‘Don’t you get yourself involved with a Japanese dancer/singer with amazing abs. She’ll lead you into trouble, mark my words.’ It seemed so oddly specific at the time, but now I understand her warning.” 

“Stop talking. If you have space in your mouth to talk, you have space in your mouth to hide a cake.” 

Chaeyoung let out an exasperated sigh and continued to pile up cakes on the trolley. When TWICE got the invite to a fully catered event held by a world famous bakery, Momo said that she was going to steal all the cakes but no-one took her seriously. In hindsight, Chaeyoung realised that they probably should’ve, Momo never jokes around when it comes to food.

Less an hour after arriving, Momo snuck off without anyone realising. If Chaeyoung hadn’t decided to go exploring, she’d have never come across Momo and would never have been roped into this little scheme. She’d be back in the main room tasting all sorts of amazing foods. Éclairs, croissants, brownies, lemon tarts, scones, just the thought of them made her mouth water.

“Okay, that looks like all of them.” Momo stood up, “Let’s get out of here and take these to the van.” Chaeyoung pushed the trolley while Momo opened doors and kept a lookout. Somehow Momo got her hands on few of the catering uniforms, Chaeyoung wasn’t sure if she wanted to know how, so very few people gave them a second look as the walked down the hallways with a trolley of what must be at least forty cakes. It would’ve been more but they got hungry and needed a break, moving a load of cakes is surprisingly tiring work.

They managed to get to the van they came in without incident. Momo opened the doors, though Chaeyoung could’ve sworn that Manager locked the car, and started unloading the trolley. They managed to fill the boot, and even had to hide some under each seat. Before they closed the van back up, they decided to have one of the smaller cakes as celebration. 

“Mmmmm,” moaned Momo, “So good. Just need something to wash it down with.”

“How about this?” Chaeyoung offered Momo a bottle of wine and two glasses.

“What the...? Did you take that from...?” 

“You don’t mention the wine, I don’t mention the cakes.”

“Deal.”

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://incorrecttwicequotes.tumblr.com/post/172601947840/jihyo-blood-is-red-bruises-are-blue-jihyo-you

_**Jihyo** : Blood is red, Bruises are blue_

_**Jihyo:** You hurt my kiddos, And I’ll do that to you._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

A woman stands over a body, holding a blood stained knife. All that can be heard is heavy breathing.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

The body clings to life with a look of terror in their eyes as they stare at the woman.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

“You should’ve known better.”

Drip.

“I warned you.”

Drip.

“No-one hurts my girls.”

Drip.

The woman kneels down. She closes her eyes and licks the blood from the knife. A shiver of pleasure passes through her.

She opens her eyes and brings the knife to the body.

Drip.

Drip.

Slice.


End file.
